The Din of Inequity

The Din of Inequity

...yes, I spelled it that way on purpose.

Monday, March 01, 2004

Pop, soda, Coke

Ugh. Remember what I wrote about stress? Looks like I managed to stress myself right into a cold. Luckily, though, thanks to my guilt about missing so much work last week due to Girlygirl's surgery, this festival of plegm is in the office today! It's pretty damn hard to get any real work done, though.

A pal of mine just forwarded my this link: Pop-vs-Soda

I think I've seen it before, and even in my pseudo-Sudafed-addled state, it's only marginally funny. I'm not sure it's supposed to be funny at all, but I refuse to accept this premise--it's failed humor as far as I'm concerned. Still, also due no doubt to the drugs and/or epazoodic, I thought I'd poke around. The only real place of interest, of course, is the "other" category. I think most people know that "soda" is mostly coastal, with a concentration smack dab in the midwest as well. "Pop" is mostly the upper half of the country, with "Coke (for everything, including the loathsome Nehi products so popular there)" being mostly the South.

I was also familiar with the Beantown conceit of "tonic," and the incredibly estimated-IQ-reducing "co-cola,*" but was somehow unaware that in North Carolina, the most popular "other" is the almost nonsensical "drink." Crazy, I know.

Where things get interesting, though, is scrolling down through the "other" options for any given state. There were a number of votes in California for "freshly ejaculated manbutter," and at least one Marylander refers to his favorite soft drink as "To God be the glory." My all-time favorite, though, brought to you by Get Your War On, is "robot sweat." Hmm. Strangely, the cartoon that contains the line, "I don't even drink Coke, it tastes like robot sweat" is missing. Well trust me--it used to be there.

*For my money, only mouth breathing or missing front teeth are greater minimizers of other people's estimate of your intelligence on first blush. I'm giving myself a pass on the mouth breathing thing for a day or two because of the cold. But you know what I mean. Interestingly, I had a friend once who said, absolutely apropos of nothing, "I never did get the hang of that breathing through your nose thing." Totally true, and pretty much explained the gobbets of white crusty stuff constantly at the corners of his mouth. Yuck. He was a pretty OK guy, though.

|| Bikeboy 2:08 PM ||
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